Jezebel’s Story: From the Depths of Self-Destruction to Redemption
When we talk about rock bottom, we often think of that one moment—the overdose, the arrest, the loss of everything. But for many, rock bottom isn’t a single event. It’s a slow, painful descent into a darkness so thick it convinces you there’s no way out. Jezebel—Jezzie, as she was known—was one of those people. Her story isn’t just one of pain; it’s one of survival, resilience, and, ultimately, redemption.
A Life of Pain and Self-Punishment
Jezzie never had a chance. Born to parents who were both heroin addicts, she was given a name meant to shame her from the start. Her name, her existence, was treated like a curse. Her parents didn’t see her as a child, only as a commodity. By the time she could walk, she was a bargaining chip. By the time she could speak, she had learned to stay silent. And by the time she was twelve, she was turning tricks to survive.
For most kids, childhood is a time of learning and laughter. For Jezzie, it was a never-ending nightmare. The streets didn’t just steal her innocence—they convinced her she never had any worth to begin with.
Then came the night she had a way out. Someone—perhaps an exhausted social worker, perhaps a stranger with a rare streak of kindness—offered her an escape. A bed, a place to heal, a sliver of hope. But hope is a tricky thing when all you’ve known is pain. And when you’ve been conditioned to believe you are worthless, even salvation feels like a trick.
Instead of taking the hand that reached out, Jezzie walked into a building filled with men and made a choice—she would punish herself the only way she knew how.
Every man, every degrading touch, every dollar handed over—it wasn’t about survival anymore. It was self-destruction in its purest form. As if she could make the pain so unbearable, it would finally stop. As if she could force the world to see her the way she saw herself: beyond saving.
The Lies We Tell Ourselves in Addiction
If you’ve ever been addicted, if you’ve ever felt like the lowest person on earth, you know the lie.
“I am unworthy.”
“No one understands me.”
“I can’t be saved.”
“This is my fate.”
Maybe your story isn’t Jezzie’s. Maybe you didn’t turn tricks. Maybe you had a house, a family, a job. But pain doesn’t discriminate, and neither does addiction. It doesn’t matter how you got here. What matters is that the thoughts in your head—the ones whispering that you are too far gone—are lying to you.
Jezzie believed those lies for years. And for years, they kept her trapped.
But here’s what she learned—and what you need to hear: rock bottom is not the end. It’s just another place you’ve passed through. You don’t have to stay there.
The Moment of Change: The Power of One Decision
Jezzie’s road to healing didn’t start with a grand revelation. There was no choir of angels. No movie-like moment of clarity.
It started with exhaustion. The kind of soul-deep exhaustion that makes you stop running.
One day, she simply stopped. She sat on a curb, broke down, and admitted the truth—not the lie she’d told herself for years, but the truth:
She wanted to live.
She wanted out.
And the moment she admitted that, everything changed.
It wasn’t easy. Healing never is. She had to relearn everything—how to trust, how to believe in herself, how to look in a mirror without hatred. She had to fight through withdrawal, through trauma, through the weight of a past that clung to her like chains.
But she did it. One day at a time. One step at a time. One moment at a time.
And so can you.
Your Redemption Starts Now
If you’re reading this, if you feel like Jezzie once did, there’s something you need to know:
You are not beyond saving.
You are not your past.
You do not have to punish yourself anymore.
Maybe you’ve made mistakes. Maybe you’ve done things you aren’t proud of. Maybe you believe you deserve the pain you’re in.
You don’t.
You deserve to heal. You deserve to be free. And that first step? It isn’t as complicated as you think.
You don’t need to have it all figured out. You don’t need to know what tomorrow looks like. You just need to admit—right here, right now—that you want more.
That you want out.
That you want to live.
The moment you make that choice, everything changes. Just like it did for Jezzie.
Take the First Step
There is help. There are people who understand. You don’t have to do this alone. Reach out—to a rehab, to a friend, to someone who’s been where you are. Just reach out.
Because the truth is, no matter how far you’ve fallen, redemption is always within reach. 💙✨ Keep reading our blog at Drug Healing for more drug addiction stories of hope and redemption. You are not alone. And if you need help now, call the SAMHSA National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). 📞💛